1950 Bathurst Street, Toronto, ON, M5P 3K9
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by Paul Kay
In late June/early July, I participated in Shalom Hartman Institute’s Community Leadership Program in Jerusalem. I had also allowed myself some days for visits. Michael Zats wrote this short poem (“Illusions”) in the aftermath of October 7th:
Amazing/ How everything looks/ Unchanged,
Even/ When nothing/ Remained/ The same.
The sense of illusion, deception even, in the contrast of the external and the internal, describes my experience.
I was last in Israel in early 2023 with my wife Temma Gentles. In our 26-years together we had three academic sabbaticals and multiple other visits. Temma had died in July 2023, so this trip was an opportunity to “close parentheses” on shared times with friends. The one and one-half years were insufficient to alter our outward appearances, but we all had large internal changes in our lives.
Israel too was changed. Yes, drivers many cars back in line still honked impatiently before the stoplight turned green; new construction continued apace; Tel Aviv sidewalk restaurants buzzed. If one somehow ignored the news and remained oblivious to the ubiquitous “bring them home” banners, one might be amazed by how everything looked unchanged. Yet conversations with friends and others quickly revealed an overwhelming mood of exhaustion, worry, despair, foreboding. Nothing was the same.
I heard many expressions of genuine appreciation for my visit. Friends welcomed the reminiscences about Temma, and my presence as a committed listener to hear and share about “Israel tomorrow”. Rabbi Splansky had asked if I would take letters from our youth to soldiers, thus making me a shaliach with a sacred mission to ensure a safe journey. My field trip from Hartman visited Sderot and the Nova Festival massacre site, where I was indeed fortunate to deliver the letters directly to a Zahal unit. The warm gratitude of the soldiers moved me deeply, and I could barely stammer todah, l’hatzliha, shalom.
Time and again people told, even implored, me to encourage others to visit Israel. Such palpable support helps make sense of the internal “nothing is the same”.
By Anne Dublin
From the time I was twelve years old and taught myself to knit from a book, I’ve been an avid knitter. Over the years, I’ve knitted sweaters, toques, scarves, and mittens for family and friends. Nothing fancy, mind you—I use mostly basic stitches like knit and purl. Knitting is one of my favourite pastimes as I watch TV in the evening after a busy day. Even if I’m watching a less-than-wonderful show, I can at least feel that I’m doing something productive. I also love the meditative feeling I sometimes get by knitting row after row of knit and purl.
So, how did I begin knitting baby sweaters for Temple? A number of years ago, during a break in choir practice, I was chatting with the late/great Matilda Bigio. Z”L She told me how she was knitting sweaters for our new babies and how Sisterhood needed more knitters. She assured me that the pattern she used was “easy”. I decided to give it a go and haven’t looked back since!
One of my greatest joys is to attend a Shabbat service that includes a baby naming. When that shiny gift bag containing a baby sweater is opened by the new parents, I “kvell” inside to know that the sweater I knit will give warmth and comfort to our newest Little Blossom.
If you’d like to join me on this “knitting journey”, or even if you have balls of wool you’d like to donate, please contact Women of Holy Blossom. More knitters are always welcome!
by Gillian Rosenberg
Communications Coordinator for Women of Holy Blossom (WHB)
WHB representative to the Northeast District of Women of Reform Judaism
In an effort to live up to our branding around diversity and inclusivity, WHB is deepening its understanding of the nature of spaces in which we interact. We have been using the term safe spaces to describe what is desirable. This term was traditionally used by 2SLGBTQ+ communities and characterized in the negative as being without bias, conflict, criticism, or threat. The term is now challenged on the premise that safety is a personal perspective or perception related to one’s own situation, both unique to a space and in regard to what participants carry with them into that space. The latter might include, for example, past trauma, pain, insecurities, differing comfort levels, burdens, and physical or cognitive challenges. Despite best efforts to anticipate the needs of others, we cannot control how they will actually feel in a space, and if they will, in fact, feel safe.
Brave spaces is suggested as an alternative term. But I think it suffers the same problem. We cannot ensure that someone will feel brave any more than we can ensure they will feel safe.
Words matter, but sometimes they risk obfuscating or distracting from the intention behind them. I think this is the case now. Therefore, instead of investing time and energy trying to articulate the right word to describe our desired spaces, only to find it is inadequate, let’s go back to basics.
What is our actual goal? Twofold: 1) that everyone in our spaces feels welcomed, comfortable, seen, celebrated, safe, and brave; 2) that everyone in our spaces works to ensure this is the case for everyone else. It is two sides of the same coin, aimed at avoiding harm and preserving dignity for all.
Based on this goal, we can reframe how we think about spaces as a shared responsibility, co-created on a foundation of pro-social and moral values, such as listening, kindness, patience, respect, fairness, honesty, generosity, and compassion. This must be negotiated and managed, in concrete terms, both in anticipation and in the moment, with every new composition of participants. What does kindness look like in our sessions, events, programs? What would be an example of someone being kind? How do we recognize when someone is in need of kindness? Ditto for the other values. Answers to these questions are less straightforward and more nuanced than one might think. Consider the inverse. Many micro-aggressions are deeply hurtful but go unnoticed by aggressors and bystanders, who may think of themselves as kind.
At the recent North American Conference for Women of Reform Judaism, the women’s affiliate of the Union for Reform Judaism, the opening ceremony included a concrete ethics statement outlining how we were to treat each other and what we could expect from others in how we are treated. An open invitation was offered to anyone wanting to discuss this further. I wish I had taken notes.
Here is a statement from the conference registration package, to give you an idea:
Women of Reform Judaism strives to create an environment of kavod (honor and respect), demonstrating regard for one another in the spirit of b’tzelim Elohim (being created in God’s image). To this end, WRJ seeks to create communities of mutual respect, physical and emotional safety, and fundamental decency, valuing equally all individuals in its sphere. We value the importance of dibbur (honest and thoughtful speech,) sh’tikah (listening silently to understand), and savlanut (patience).
It is difficult, maybe impossible, to capture the comprehensiveness of this deeply Jewish and humane statement in a single word. And WHB does not wish to engage in such an academic exercise. Rather, we are interested in what this looks like in practice and how it is realized in action. So, stay tuned as we follow the exemplary lead of WRJ and continue to work on living up to our branding.
If you would like to help, please email us at [email protected].
Our Jewish wisdom is full of different reasons for why we might perform mitzvot, or sacred commandments. They might be to do with our notions of, or relationship with God, meaning we might do them because God has instructed us as Jews to do so, or has promised some kind of reward or punishment if we don’t. They might be to do with our own ethical imperatives, as stated by Torah – not bribing, or stealing, or placing a stumbling block in front of the blind, for example, since it “confounds the words of the righteous” (Exodus 23:8). There may even be utilitarian reasons, as per Maimonides, who stated that we might not know all the purposes behind each mitzvah, but that they led to the best possible outcome, for the greatest number of fellow people. Sometimes, we even do them lishma, for their own sake.
This is a way of saying that I am in awe each day of the mitzvot performed here at Holy Blossom, and all the many ways that they happen. Today, I want to take the chance to uplift just a few that occur, sometimes quietly, sometimes more explicitly, under my department of Kehila Kedosha.
The first is our Kugel Kindness initiative. Did you know that we have a dedicated cadre of volunteers who bake and deliver the comforting meal of a kugel to those in our congregation who are at times of significant life transition (bereavement, major illness,o r a new baby)? You may have been on the receiving end of one, you may have helped with the baking or delivering, but it is always heartwarming to know when they are appreciated as an aspect of bringing our community closer. We are grateful to our sister congregation at Bet Shalom in Minnesota for allowing us to learn from them and get this idea off the ground!
The second is related, which is our Bikkur Cholim program. Whether it’s a phone/Zoom match for someone who is isolated, a card when you’re ill, or handwritten notes and Jewish programming at retirement facilities around Shabbat and holidays, they are the ones who help our members feel seen and cared for at their most vulnerable.
Bereishit Rabbah teaches us that the mitzvot were given “solely to refine humanity”. It is these amazing people who carry them out, that give me great hope for the capacity of humanity to do good, to make a difference in the lives of others, and who not only talk the talk, but walk the walk, of our Reform Jewish values and congregational ethos – all with humility, warmth, and compassion.
If you would like to get involved in this important work, or to find out more, drop me (Rabbi McCarroll – [email protected]) a line, and I’d love to hear from you!
by Teresa Quiroz, on behalf of Women of Holy Blossom
Tammuz (Tamuz) is the fourth of the 12 months of the Jewish calendar, counting from Nisan. It means “heat” like a glowing furnace, very appropriate (for this season) as the sun is more radiant and at its height. It also signifies “Transformation”.
The Mishna Taanit 4:3 (Oral Law) lists five tragic events of Jewish history that happened: #1. Moses smashed the first tablets on the 17 of Tammuz, on seeing the golden calf. #2. During the period of the first Temple, the besieged population of Jerusalem could not obtain an animal for the daily sacrifice. #3. The walls of Jerusalem were breached by the Romans during the second Temple period. #4. Apustamus, a Roman officer, burnt a Torah scroll. #5 an idol was placed in the holy Temple.
The limb of the month: The Right Hand, which has a practical application used to, celebrate Shabbat and to help us love G/d by following the 248 positive commandments.
The tribe associated with Tammuz is Reuven, the oldest son of Jacob, whose name means ‘see a son’, Genesis 29-32 and is derived from the sense of sight. Which leads to the attribute of the month: Vision. A sense of vision to bring peace into the world which can be transformed from mourning and sadness into joy and redemption.
וַתַּ֤הַר לֵאָה֙ וַתֵּ֣לֶד בֵּ֔ן וַתִּקְרָ֥א שְׁמ֖וֹ רְאוּבֵ֑ן כִּ֣י אָֽמְרָ֗ה כִּֽי־רָאָ֤ה יְהֹוָה֙ בְּעׇנְיִ֔י כִּ֥י עַתָּ֖ה יֶאֱהָבַ֥נִי אִישִֽׁי׃
Leah conceived and bore a son, and named him Reuben;*Reuben Understood as “See a son.” for she declared, “It means: ‘יהוהhas seen*has seen Heb. ra’ah, connected with the first part of “Reuben.” my affliction’; it also means: ‘Now my husband will love me.’”*
The permutation of the month: HVHY (hey-vav-hey-yud), from the final letters of the passage in Esther (5:13)
וְכׇל־זֶ֕ה אֵינֶ֥נּוּ שֹׁוֶ֖ה לִ֑י בְּכׇל־עֵ֗ת אֲשֶׁ֨ר אֲנִ֤י רֹאֶה֙ אֶת־מׇרְדֳּכַ֣י הַיְּהוּדִ֔י יוֹשֵׁ֖ב בְּשַׁ֥עַר הַמֶּֽלֶךְ׃
zeHenenUshaveHleY, spoken by Haman. The order is the direct reverse of the Name’s regular form, YHVH.
Tammuz, means Transformation and Redemption. Why? Understanding that the previous month Sivan, which was considered the ‘Giver’ of the Torah when G/d gives the commandments to the Jewish people and Tammuz is the month considered the ‘Receiver’. It is when we truly apply the Torah. Moses went up the mountain on the 4th month representing the “Receiver”.
Back to the Zodiac sign, Cancer (Crab) has a shell that hosts a body that grows and when the shell breaks metaphorically speaking ‘breaks the mold’. Meaning we too can change and transform. We too have ‘growth spurs’ not only of the body but spiritually. As we grow older we become smarter and (hopefully) wiser. Our bodies too during this month are experiencing the freedom of shedding “the outer shell” i.e. leaving our coats behind from the winter, freedom of our sins, from our animal soul, narcissism, heartbreak, hardship etc.
I wish you all a radiant and warm summer months.
Ken Yehi Ratzon!
Shacharit Service: Sunday, July 7, 2024, 9 am ET, in-person or via Zoom at https://zoom.us/j/93902401402?pwd=dGlOR2dEcGs1RVc0OVFwdkFtOVo5UT09
password: 667580
For upcoming dates and why Rosh Chodesh is special for women, see https://holyblossom.org/rosh-chodesh/
1950 Bathurst Street, Toronto, ON, M5P 3K9
(416) 789-3291
[email protected]
Emergency Funeral Contact
Cell: 416-565-7561